Monday, September 1, 2008

August is a memory

August is a hard month. There is always a grey cloud on the horizon...

My younger son's birthday is in August, near the end of the month. Although he stopped having birthdays 17 months ago, that day, that birth day, belongs to him.

Though God sometimes leads me in a difficult path, I always, always, find evidence of the fact that He has gone before me to make that path bearable.

How, you ask? I'll give a few (chosen from a multitude) examples.

1.) Eight years ago, a little girl arrived in our family on August 26th, the day before her uncle's birthday. At the time the birthdays seemed to be piling up. Now? We are grateful for a person to hug and give gifts to... a distraction from the fact that we can't do that the following day.

2.) Last week, Rod had an unexpected vacation week. It happened so abruptly, that we had no special plans and he spent the week playing Mr. Fix-it here at home. (It was a good week for me not to be alone.) And, because he was not working, we could spend August 26th with our granddaughter... watching her face fill with delighted embarrassment as her classmates sang Happy Birthday to her.

Juliana hands out treats
3.) Sunday night, 12 of our family members gathered at Carraba's in Ka'zoo to celebrate the birthday. We reviewed the "remember whens", laughed, and grieved... It was a soothing time for all of us. The crowning point, just before parting ways, was when our grandson (who bears his uncle's name) stood outside Barnes & Noble regaling us with jokes that Grey would have loved. We laughed all the way to our cars, satisfied that Grey had been properly honored.

joke time
And now it's September... an easier month. I thank God for carrying me through... for loving me... for caring for my son.

He that dwelleth in the secret place of the most High shall abide under the shadow of the Almighty. I will say of the Lord, He is my refuge and my fortress: my God; in him will I trust. Psalm 91:1,2


Anonymous said...

Barb, you can choose not to post this but I wanted to say a big apology last night when you were speaking of birthdays I thought you were speaking of Rod didn't dawn on me that you were speaking of Grey. So if I sounded sincerely "oh..or ah"...I didn't mean to sound less than empathetic (although I cannot rightly empathize).

Yes, I'd agree, you are surrounded by much love and reminders of God's continued goodness! But the sting may remain forever...till the final Hurrah! C. nottingham

cHim-prints said...

Don't be concerned! I knew that you didn't know who I was talking about... and it's ok.

Jessica said...

we miss him too, aunt barb.
we love you & your family :)